{"id":1722,"date":"2015-06-02T08:00:34","date_gmt":"2015-06-02T14:00:34","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/theunspeakableoath.com\/home\/?p=1722"},"modified":"2015-05-31T20:14:40","modified_gmt":"2015-06-01T02:14:40","slug":"monsters-film-review","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/theunspeakableoath.com\/home\/2015\/06\/monsters-film-review\/","title":{"rendered":"Monsters (film) review"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"http:\/\/theunspeakableoath.com\/home\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/05\/x61-ELD-Monsters.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-medium wp-image-1723\" src=\"http:\/\/theunspeakableoath.com\/home\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/05\/x61-ELD-Monsters-300x225.jpg\" alt=\"x61 ELD Monsters\" width=\"300\" height=\"225\" srcset=\"http:\/\/theunspeakableoath.com\/home\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/05\/x61-ELD-Monsters-300x225.jpg 300w, http:\/\/theunspeakableoath.com\/home\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/05\/x61-ELD-Monsters-560x420.jpg 560w, http:\/\/theunspeakableoath.com\/home\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/05\/x61-ELD-Monsters-260x195.jpg 260w, http:\/\/theunspeakableoath.com\/home\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/05\/x61-ELD-Monsters-160x120.jpg 160w, http:\/\/theunspeakableoath.com\/home\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/05\/x61-ELD-Monsters.jpg 600w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/><\/a><strong>Directed by Gareth Edwards<br \/>\nDistributed by Magnet Releasing (U.S.) and Vertigo Films (U.K.)<br \/>\nReviewed by Brian M. Sammons<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>If you\u2019ve heard about this little movie at all, then you probably heard that it was made for a pittance but looks as good as any Hollywood big-budget movie today and no one knows how writer-director Gareth Edwards did it. While that is undeniably true, good looks can only get you so far. Unless the story, acting and direction are good, all the cool special effects in the world can\u2019t save a film. The three Star Wars prequels taught me that.<\/p>\n<p><em>Monsters<\/em> has a slight nod to dear old HPL in the form of the titular critters, but that\u2019s as far as the Lovecraftian goodness goes. These beasties came to Earth thanks to a satellite that crashed on the U.S.\/Mexico border. Little did anyone know that the satellite had some microbes hitching a ride on it. The tiny space bugs didn\u2019t stay little for long. Soon, tentacled titans created a no man\u2019s land between the United States and Mexico. And so begins this film\u2019s not-so-subtle message on current border and immigration problems. Granted, the message isn\u2019t as bluntly hammered into your face as in the last couple of George Romero zombie flicks; but when the movie that best tackles this hot-button topic this year is the silly, splatstick Machete and not your \u201chigh-minded\u201d message movie, then you have failed.<\/p>\n<p>OK, the message is heavy-handed, but is the rest of the movie good? Well, the monsters are really neat and they are used effectively. What could be Cthulhu\u2019s cousins are at first seen only partially, at night, cloaked in darkness, or through grainy, green military-style night vision. Much like <em>Jaws<\/em>, this builds both dread and anticipation for the big reveal. When that moment comes it is a good payoff, a testament to technical wizardry.<\/p>\n<p>Sadly, this flick moves at a glacial pace. I could forgive that if the film used that time to build up and flesh out the characters, but it doesn\u2019t. The two stars are one-dimensional and thoroughly annoying. There\u2019s the jaded photojournalist whose only care in the world is to get great shots of the monsters to make the big bucks. He is asked to return a rich man\u2019s wayward daughter to the U.S. as she just so happens to be in the same area. These two remain unlikable to the end. Sure, Mr. Cynical Reporter has the mandatory change of heart, but it feels as forced and unbelievable as the obligatory romantic tension. It\u2019s all part of the same paint-by-numbers playbook that this movie follows from start to finish.<\/p>\n<p>If you are expecting an action-oriented sci-fi monster movie\u2014the sort you might expect from a movie called Monsters\u2014then you will be disappointed. This film is a slow-moving travelogue of Mexico featuring two characters who you could care less about and who only very occasionally bump into some cool-looking, Cthulhuoid creatures.<\/p>\n<p><em>Monsters<\/em> gets 4 out of 10 phobias, and it only gets that many for the cool, cosmic, CGI cephalopods.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Directed by Gareth Edwards Distributed by Magnet Releasing (U.S.) and Vertigo Films (U.K.) Reviewed by Brian M. Sammons If you\u2019ve heard about this little movie at all, then you probably heard that it was made for a pittance but looks&hellip;<\/p>\n<p class=\"more-link-p\"><a class=\"more-link\" href=\"http:\/\/theunspeakableoath.com\/home\/2015\/06\/monsters-film-review\/\">Read more &rarr;<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":1723,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[338,61,45],"tags":[293],"class_list":["post-1722","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-4-phobias","category-eye-of-light-and-darkness","category-tuo-19","tag-brian-m-sammons"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"http:\/\/theunspeakableoath.com\/home\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/05\/x61-ELD-Monsters.jpg","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p2OyM1-rM","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/theunspeakableoath.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1722","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/theunspeakableoath.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/theunspeakableoath.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/theunspeakableoath.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/theunspeakableoath.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1722"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/theunspeakableoath.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1722\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1724,"href":"http:\/\/theunspeakableoath.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1722\/revisions\/1724"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/theunspeakableoath.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1723"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/theunspeakableoath.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1722"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/theunspeakableoath.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1722"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/theunspeakableoath.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1722"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}